Sledding

One of Aunt Sunny's last days here and we decided to venture up to Mt. Spokane for sledding. The trip there was less than enjoyable, and definitely one of those days where the end fun makes it all worthwhile, but as 3 kids were whining and complaining, it made us rethink our plans.

Shane is my daredevil trying to go as fast as possible. For the beginning, Anders was happy to be with us, but by then end, he wanted to go all by himself and told me just that. So we did and he survived.





Anders going up the tow rope all by himself.

Grief

I do not know how I am going to get through this day or this week or this year. Right now I am suffocating and have that feeling of not knowing when I will breathe normal air again. I do not know how I will face Danielle, or Lexi, or Austin or my mom. I need to be strong for them, but I know that one look in their faces and I will lose all composure. Brian is so busy being strong for me that he can not even properly grieve. I thought I had prepared myself for this day. I did not want to fully admit this day would come, because that seemed like I was losing hope, but I knew there was a chance and so I played out how I would feel in my head. My head had no idea. I am in immense physical pain, I feel Alex's loss at my core, and then I feel guilty because it is selfish. He is healed now; he is not in pain; who am I to complain of my agony when I should be rejoicing that he is in Heaven.

So I will grieve a bit longer and then I will honor my promise to him to take care of Danielle, and Lexi and Austin.

Manzanillo

Thank you to Richard and Merrilee for taking us on a trip to Manzanillo, Mexico. We left the kids in Texas with Grandpa Jo and Grandma Anne, thank you so much, and we went with Brian's siblings and Merrile and Richard. We could only go for 4 days, but we had a wonderful time. Lots of Mexican food, probably too much, but no illness. I was having some pregnancy nausea, but ginger pills were working wonders, and Brian's family was kind enough to give me preferential seating for the car rides.

Here are some photos of our fun, I was a less than stellar pregnant person, but I had fun and this baby will love adventure. Not to mention, the car rides were rougher than the 4 wheeling or horseback riding.

Thanksgiving

27 people in our house for Thanksgiving was an adventure.

Shane and Myann Stats

Shane's stats:
Weight: 49 lbs (80%)
Height: 44 7/8 inches (75%)
BMI: 17 1/2  (90%)

Shane has usually been about the same height and weight, so this was his first departure from that.

Myann's stats:
Weight: 36 lbs. (50%)
Height 40 inches (50%)
BMI 16 (75%)

Happy 4th Birthday Myann!!!

Dear Myann,

The other day I looked at you and paused. I do not know how you grew so fast. You are always telling me that you are not little and that you are growing, but I think I failed to realize just how much you have grown until that pause the other day. You stood there in track pants that barely touched your ankles, of course you refused to take them off because no one can tell you to do anything, but it was proof of how much you have grown in just the past 3 months. Physical growth is only one small part of your growth. You want to run the neighborhood with the boys and do everything that they do. I have no doubt you would be fine, but I think I will hold you close a little bit longer. You are still challenging, you are still stubborn, you are still complicated, but I am slowly learning to understand you and we are finding our way together. I love that you are so lovable, and even on the days when I do not have time for endless hugs and snuggles, I try to just enjoy them because you will not always be small enough to climb into my lap for snuggles. You are our budding artist, thank God, because none of the rest of us have a lick of artistic talent. You are smart, though you are determined to not let me find out; you are compassionate, but only when you are feeling love; you are shy, but only when you are putting on an act; you are all boy, except for when it comes to purple. We have no idea what to get you for your birthday because you only want what Shane has. You are not into babies or barbies or dress-up. You like sword fights and wrestling and throwing balls. You do love your movies and taking care of your stuffed animals. You have said you want to be an animal doctor and I think you have found your calling. We love you big girl and look forward to the adventure that life with you will bring.

Thank you for understanding people

Today was a normal day, take all 3 kids to the gym and get home in time for lunch and then back to school for Shane. Sounds easy enough, right? I thought so until I got a call from the gym asking if by chance we came home with the wrong shoes. I thought, no we're good and then they asked that I check. Sure enough, Anders had one of his boots and another boot that was double the size. Somehow I managed to put Anders in a shoe twice his foot size and not even notice. I was quite embarrassed and said I would be there in 20 minutes to swap out the boot. Once I thought back I wondered why Anders was walking funny, that boy has skills that he walked a fair distance in a gigantic boot through the snow. Thankfully the mother of the child was quite kind when I returned the boot. She smiled and said, no worries, I have been there too, why would a mother of 3 notice something as insignificant as a boot. Thank you God for gracious people who do not make us feel like morons.